BTVS: Where Oh Where Has My Flower Gone?
by Tharpdevenport
Summary: As part of a fan fic contest by a board member of Buffy Downunder, WOWHMFG? was a titled provided by the member. Fellow members had to come up with a story. This was striaght off my head. I think I spell checked it one time. It may suck!


Night time comes apon Sunnydale sky. A black bird, a huge predator of the night with a 12 foot wing span rides the night air high up above.  
  
"Okay, I'll see you guys tomorrow," says a Buffy who heads out to patrol. Xander and Anya continue to walk home.  
  
"Anne, you feeling all right?"  
  
Anya looks down.  
  
"Cause you can tell me. I'm like a confessional except I lack preist hood and am very chosy about just who gets a hail marry. Not just anyone can hail marry, only the select few and..."  
  
Anya cuts him off.  
  
"Where do you see us going from here?"  
  
Xander smiles.  
  
"First your place, so I can drop you off safe and sound."  
  
"That's not what I emant. This relationship, this thing we have. Is it all just fun and games and sweaty stuff, or are we going to do something more."  
  
"Anya, what more could there be. With love as the driver, everything else takes a back seat. We can run any red light."  
  
He massages her shoulders and she quites down.  
  
The bird of the night's eyes glow yellow and it sheeds all it's feathers. It falls to the ground. Smack! The bird it's the payvement dead infront of Anya and Xander.  
  
"Ewww!!!" yells Anya.  
  
A feather from the bird lands on the back of her neck. The stray feather hairs squirm around like worms and dig into her skin.  
  
"What the hell was that?" asks Xander. He looks at the bird perplexed.  
  
Anya's eyes glow yellow and return to normal.  
  
"I think we had better get going. Come on."  
  
"No thank you," says Anya, "I can do so myself." and she storms off quitely.  
  
Xander looks and calls out.  
  
"Anya! Anya wait for me! This was so much easier with Cordillia - at least I knew wherer to find her. Good old faithful broom closet."  
  
He heads home.  
  
-End part one-  
  
Part 2:  
  
The pale moonlight shines through Anya's apartment windows.  
  
The feathers move just underneath the epidermous of the skin and grow out until her face is fuzzy. Her eyes snap open and she gets out of bed.  
  
Xander walks with Buffy toward another one of Sunnydale's 12 locations of cemeteries.  
  
"I am telling you it was weird. The thing just fell to the ground dead. It had no feathers. After that anya started acting really strangly."  
  
"How is that different from always?" said Buffy.  
  
"Buff, come on. I'm serious. She just wasn't her usual bombastic self. Not that I enjoy my ear being talked off and what not."  
  
"So she went home?"  
  
"I think so. At least she was headed in that general direction."  
  
"Well, there is a gas station not far from here. Well use a pay phone and call her."  
  
Xander stops and looks at her and says,  
  
"You want to call Anya?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"In the middle of the night?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Because you thought it was a good idea after talking to me?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Why don't you just plunge me through the heart right now and save me the trouble!"  
  
"Your dick. Never leave home without it."  
  
"Very funny Buffy, but..."  
  
Buffy stops and listens. Xander sees her do it and copies her.  
  
"What?" asks Xander.  
  
"Shhh..." she replies.  
  
"Buffy the suspense is killing me."  
  
"And so will what ever else is out there if you don't shut up."  
  
"Right."  
  
She listens for about a minute and then continues moving.  
  
"What was it?"  
  
"I don't know. There's the gas station. Let's call Anya. You got a quarter?"  
  
Xander spreads his arms out and says,  
  
"Hello! Single white male! What do you think?"  
  
Buffy looks around and smashes the change compartment on the pay phone open. Quarters spill apon the floor.  
  
"Whoa, jackpot!" says Xander. He tries to pick one up.  
  
"No. No stealing." says Buffy.  
  
"Why not? You're doing it?"  
  
"Well it different."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"Well I am going to pay them back."  
  
"How?" asks Xander.  
  
"Sent them a quarter in the mail or something, or ... never mind. Her phones not answering. I'll call Giles. He lives not to far from her. He can go check up on her."  
  
She dials. Giles picks up and Buffy explains what is happening.  
  
"I'l go check on her." he says.  
  
"And if she is not there I want you to come meet us at, hold on. Xander, where was that bird?"  
  
"About a block from the theater. Near the old magic shop."  
  
"Did you get that?" asks Buffy.  
  
"Yes. I'll see what I can do. Buffy, good luck."  
  
SKREEEEEEEEETTTTTTCCCCHHHHHHH!!!!!  
  
A horrible sound of a bird comes from above. Buffy looks up. She sthinks she saw something, but the sky clears. The moonlight now apon her face and the reflections of the clouds in her eyes.  
  
"Holy freeholies! What was that Buffy?"  
  
"I don't know. I think we better head home now."  
  
She starts walking. Xander looks up and Buffy turns around and grabs him by the arm.  
  
"We're only a couple of blocks away. Can't miss it, it's right in the middle of the street. Dead. Not alive, dead. Not struggling for breath or half way run over. That bird has cease to be. It is no more. No more free flying days and care free adventures. It's dead."  
  
"Xander," says Buffy, "I get it. Now could you ease up on your post traumatic bird syndrome?"  
  
"Buffy, the thing fell infront of us stone could. Featherless. What could cause that?"  
  
"Maybe it just flew in from New York and it's arms were really really tired." she laughs "Get it? The little bird flew in and it's arms were tired? Xander?"  
  
She feels a breeze and turns around. Xander is not there. She hears him scream. She looks around and doesn't see him and then after he screams her name again she catches it's location and looks upward. There Xander is being held in the claws a person sized bird. A bird that looks an awful lot like Anya.  
  
"Anya?" she calls out.  
  
"Buffy help me!" Xander yells.  
  
Buffy runs to catch up as the bird is now flying toward the location of the dead bird.  
  
"Xander! Don't look, but I think that's Anay that has you!"  
  
"Buffy I can't turn even turn around! I'm much to worrie about falling to my painful death! What do I do?!"  
  
Anay lands with Xander in hand about a hundred feet from the dead bird and let's go. It flys up and circles Xander like prey. It swoops down and spreads it's wings wide. A huge twelve foot wing span. Anya makes funny noises and poises he sharp beak at Xander face. Just as she is about to poke her beak into Xander's temple she falls foward and lands on Xander. Anya gets up and turns around. Buffy had kicked her down.  
  
"Sorry. Didn't mean to ruffle your feathers but..."  
  
Suddenly Anya swipes her wings open quickly and a violant gust of wind thrusts out and knocks Buffy back a few inches. She closes her eyes so to not get any debris in them. she opens them and Anya is gone.  
  
"AAAARRRRRRKKKKKK!!!!!"  
  
She looks up and ducks just intime to avoid Anya's ravor sharp claws. She climbs back up into the air and gets ready to swoop down. Buffy turns her head up and watches Anay swoop down. Anya comes down almost straight and Buffy ducks fowards again. But this time Anya immedietaly curves into a loop and before Buffy knows it Anya is infront of her again and knocks about five feet away onto the ground.  
  
"Owww," says Buffy.  
  
Anya lands back apon Xander and looks at him.  
  
"Anya! Please no! I love you! Even if you are hairier than me and are sort of like the real life version of Hawk Girl."  
  
Anya lifts her beak up and thrusts down toward Xander's forehead.  
  
At that very moment Giles's car comes around the corner toward them.  
  
THUD! THUD!  
  
He stops his car and looks behind him.  
  
"Oh dear, I must have..."  
  
He stops. He ran over tha dead bird.  
  
AS Anya's beak comes down her eyes flash yellow and her bones and skin morph back into herself. The sound of her bones crackling. Xander opens his eye just long enough to see Anya head hit his. Whach! they both are knocked out unconscious.  
  
"Buffy!" Giles calls out. "Are you all right?"  
  
He helps her up. The feathers on Anya's skin shrivle up and turn grey and fall off of her. Onto Xander no less. Buffy and Giles after checking on Anya and Xander walk over toward the bird he had run over.  
  
"Giles, what is it?"  
  
"He adjusts his glases and thinks, "I seem to. I think if I am not mistaken a Night Carrier. But I thought they were extinct."  
  
"What's a night carrier?"  
  
"Well several thousands of years ago an evil by the name Dayhawk was defeated by that times Slayer and thought in order to best spread his minions he used a bird and cast some sort of spell apon it. That which would transfoer it int oa larger size for fight and it's feathers act as a virus. Spreading throughout the body. Until it turns you totally into a bird."  
  
"I am SO glad we don't live in those times."  
  
"Quite right. A Hell Mouth and vampires are much better at form of luck."  
  
"You know what I mean. So what caused it to fall from the sky? Why did it die suddenly?"  
  
"Well these events so happened to take place in Africa. A group of Mystical Tribesmen devenloped some sort of magical cure. No one really knows. IT was fired from an arrow."  
  
"I don't see any arrow sticking out of it," Buffy notices.  
  
"Well accounts are sketchy at best, but after being it the bird not having any fingers or appendages any longer would rub up against trees and fly upside down on the forrest tops just to get the arrow out. Luckily it was the arow head that was poisened and not the shaft itself."  
  
"That was far more information than I wanted. And correct me if I am wrong, but did you jsut say shaft?" Buffy says with wide eyes.  
  
"Yes well," Giles stumbles over his words, "you see ... but ... I..."  
  
Xander and Anya regain consciousness. Xander smiles.  
  
"You see, I always knew you'd fall for me."  
  
"Xander," a shaken Anya replies, "where are we? And why am I..."  
  
She looks around.  
  
"Why am I lying naked on you in the middle of the street???!!! Xander Harris!!!"  
  
Buffy and Giles examine the bird.  
  
"So you are saying there is a half naked African guy running around Sunnydale?"  
  
"Stranger things have happened Buffy."  
  
"You suppose they would have a thing for a young strong American girl who can kill vampires?"  
  
He turns and frowns at her.  
  
"No, I didn't mean that. Besides, he's not even a vampire anyway."  
  
He continues to look at her oddly.  
  
"Touchy tonight."  
  
They pick it up and head toward his truck.  
  
"Suppose we can have this for Thankgiving supper?"  
  
"Giles finally laughs. So does Buffy.  
  
"Buffy! You coat." Xander says.  
  
Buffy takes off her long leather jacket and hands it to Xander. He wraps it aroudn Anya.  
  
"You guys going to be okay?" Buffy asks.  
  
Xander smiles and looks at Anya and replies,  
  
"Like birds of a feather we stick together. I'm going to walk her home guys. Will call you and let you know when we get there."  
  
"Xander do you still love me?" Anya asks.  
  
"You we're really going to peck my brians out were you?"  
  
"No! No. At least I don't think I ... I was." she replies.  
  
"Yeah, I still love you. For a second there, just a second, I thought I had lost my little flower."  
  
"Ahhhhh, I'm your little flower?"  
  
He wrpas his right arm around her as they walk and snuggles up close.  
  
"You my little rose. I for one can see it."  
  
"I think I see it too." says Anya.  
  
They walk silently toward home in the approaching morning dawn. 


End file.
